I no longer call you servants Instead, I have called you friends …
- John 15:15
Not too long ago, I found myself constantly down in the dumps. I wanted to scream, shout, cry! I was so irritable that I could just bite. I so badly needed someone to talk to but found no one around! For the first time in my life, I was alone – all alone!!! I felt lost, empty and confused. I was so not living the life of a 22yr old … I probably was the only one my age who’s life revolved around work and work and oh, did I mention work??? I had no social life … to be honest I felt I had no life at all! I felt like a total loser! How did things change so much???
I couldn’t believe myself – A happy-go-lucky girl like me was friendless! Ever since Tripthi left for Muscat, I could not strike the same comfort level with anyone. The only two other really close friends I had were perpetually busy with work or with their girlfriends. I tried my best to keep in touch with all my friends and be a good a friend but then I began to wonder – may be I’m just butting in to these guys’ life. I mean, if they really cared about me, they’d make an attempt to make me feel wanted … I had now reached a point where I myself didn’t want to keep in touch with anyone – I mean, where were they when I really needed them???
These feelings of bitterness and complete loneliness got to me so badly that I was diagnosed with clinical depression! In fact the doctor even felt I should be put on medication – antidepressants. This came as a rude shock to me. For those of you who know me, you’d understand why I was taken aback when I was diagnosed with depression …
It was at that time that I did a reality check. Where was I? What was I doing? Had a totally forgotten Who really matters??? – I indeed had! At that point of time, I decided to run in to the arms of my Best Friend – Jesus Christ. How could I have forgotten what He said – “I have called you friend” … I had Jesus by my side all along and look at me wallowing in self-pity. It took a while but I began to understand Who really matters and to Whom I really matter!
What a friend we have in Jesus, All our sins and grief to bear, What a privilege to carry everything to the Lord in prayer!!!
